Peppermint Twist
by Thorn In Your Side
Summary: Kanda believes its environmentally unsound for two people to shower separately and waste water when they can shower together. Lavi is in it because he won't give up on his dream of shower sex.


**Peppermint Twist **

**Disclaimer: Don't own D. Grey-Man or the song. **

**A/N: This is the final oneshot of a trilogy, all newcomers~ The first is called "Splish Splash" and the second is called "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow". They're in continuity, so it might be easier to understand if you read those too. **

**Summary: Kanda believes it's environmentally unsound for two people to shower separately and waste water when they can shower together. Lavi's in it because he won't give up on his dream of shower sex. **

**x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x**

"I'm done."

The announcement came from the exhausted redhead standing in the middle of the apartment that was had been absolutely filthy a few hours ago. Kanda blinked himself awake from his position on the couch.

"The place is cleaner than it was when we moved it," Lavi added.

"Yeah," Kanda yawned, stretching. His lover watched, a lecherous gleam in his eye, as the man's back arched, his feet braced against the arm of the couch. "You and I are pretty fuckin' dirty though."

Lavi flopped onto the brunet's stomach.

"I wonder what we should do about that."

Kanda kissed his cheek. "We take a _**shower, **_idjit."

000

"Yuu, you're such a girl."

"Lavi, you're such an asshole."

The redhead squinted at him irately. "Fuck, man. Look at all these shampoos and shit. The hell haven't I noticed them before?"

"Because you barely ever come in here except to crap," Kanda retorted, "I've had these, like, always. Usually they're under the sink, I got 'em out for my bath last night."

"And that's another thing," Lavi said as he pulled out some towels, "The hell is with you and bubble baths when you're so...saving-water...conscious?"

"You only shower every other day, being the smelly fag that you are," Kanda pointed out, " And when you do shower, we do it together. So we save up enough water for me to take a bubble bath every week."

"I still think its gay."

"Okay, do you _**realize **_the irony of that sentence, asshole?"

Lavi picked up Kanda, threw him over his shoulder, and stepped into the tub.

"Don't really care," he grunted over the sound of his boyfriend swearing as he fiddled with the faucet. A stream of lukewarm water was spat at them and Kanda screamed, his clothes rapidly drenched. Lavi put him down and started to undress, thoroughly enjoying the sight of a wet Kanda.

"Asshole," the brunet chattered, taking off his pants and turning on the boombox with the waterproof remote, "Dick, jerk, fuck, shit eating _**pig.**_"

"Ella?" Lavi looked with horror at the source of music, "Ella _**Fitzgerald**_? Fuck no," he said, and switched the mode from CD to cassette, because yes, their boombox was old school.

_Got a new dance and it goes like this!_

"Fifties crap," Kanda muttered rebelliously as he adjusted the shower's temperature.

_Name of the dance is the Peppermint Twist!_

"Dude," Lavi laughed, "You got a body wash named that!"

_You'll like it like this—_

"Lavi, put that loofah down!"

_The Peppermint Twist!_

The redhead squeezed some of the green goop onto the loofah and applied it to Kanda's chest, a hand pressed to his lower back so he couldn't twist away. The sharp tang of mint and cloves exploded in the steam and Lavi nibbled on Kanda's lips as they squeezed the loofah together, washing each others' stomachs.

_Round and round, up and down_

"Oh, baby," Lavi sighed as Kanda's fingers wandered south. Foam slid down his skin and down his legs, dissolving in the water on the tub floor. He poured more of the body wash over Kanda's shoulder.

_Meet me baby on 45__th__ street, _

Barely conscious of what he was doing, Lavi pushed Kanda against the wall, cajoling him into spread his legs.

_Where the Peppermint Twisters meet!_

Their lips met again, the heady scent of steam and soap and wet bodies encouraging them softly.

_You'll learn to do this—_

Lavi lifted Kanda's hips…

_The Peppermint Twist! _

And slipped, crashing down painfully with the brunet on top, cussing a blue tizzy. Kanda started laughing hysterically even as he helped his lover sit up and checked his head for injuries.

_Round and round, up and down…_

"Oh, baby," Kanda chuckled, "Stupid baby. How many fuckin' times do I have to tell you, bastard, that if you're going to jump me in the shower you'll need water resistant lube—and _**balance**_?"

Lavi let himself be cuddled, enjoying the rare display of affection on Kanda's part.

"One day," he promised, "I'll get it down pat."

**x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x**

**Hehehehe…**


End file.
